What and how do I tell the children when a loved one goes to prison? It is every parent’s right to decide how and when to tell the children – and this should be the question to ask yourself, rather than “shall I tell the children”. Providing a time and space to speak with your children and allow them to ask any questions they may have will provide a safe environment for your children, where they will be able to understand that none of this is their fault and they should not be ashamed. Manage Cookie Preferences